when
did i ever learn to love the bitter winter?
no
grass grows here, no fruits to pick on barren vines
it is
still, frigid, and the squirrels
scramble
up scratched-down trestles scrounging for scraps
yet i
choose to brave the cold, where before i looked for
a
warm fireplace, or a sandy beach.
where
did my escapist heart go?
when
we sit in the Meditation Hall, we are told to stay
in
full lotus unmoving
watching
the pain course through
the
legs
and
up
the
spine
unwinding
in a bodily revolt,
a
'what's this for' pang of fear
as a
wandering thought
will
wonder whether a leg can numb forever
someday,
then, I will notice -
start
to wonder if this pain is really me
or
just a passing shadow moving up a barren tree.
could
this patience really be
the
lack of abiding in any state of being?
walking
in the greenbelt now covered in white
the
spring trail keeps itself in name only---
***
Exercise 1: Patience Object Exercise
Please read the poem about patience,
and as you are doing so, reflect on the following:
What are some metaphors, images or
thoughts that come to mind when you reflect on the word “patience”? Try to come
up with a particular poem, art work, writing or other kind of expression which
sums up your attitude toward patience and/or how to maintain patience. Save
this exercise as “Patience Exercise 1”. Feel free to post this to your blog
when you are finished.
Exercise 2: Patience Mapping and
Reflection Exercise
In the English language, we often
hear expressions which reveal to us our relationship with patience. Some
examples are :
- “Hold your horses” (implies reining in one’s desires—a hearkening back to parable of the ‘chariots’ of emotions in Plato’s Republic?)
- “Cool your heels (or, alternately, “cool your jets”, “cool it”)
- “Try one’s patience” (patience as something to be tested, as in a court of law)
- “Has the patience of a saint” (patience is hard to acquire, and only to be had by a few)
- “I ran out of patience” (considers patience as a physical resource, similar to gas)
- “Take a chill pill” (patience is something that cools down, and can be taken in a drug form)
Try to find a few other expressions
you know about related to having patience or losing it. See if you can map
these expressions in terms of common metaphors (coolness, for example; trial
metaphor; patience as commodity, etc.). Did you find anything particularly
surprising about the patterns that you found in how patience is expressed?
Write down your observations.
Take a moment to reflect, what do
these metaphors or ways of framing patience tell us about our cognitive
understandings of patience? You might want to consider reading Lakoff &
Johnson’s article, “The Metaphorical Structure of the Human Conceptual
System” (1980) to get a better picture of how language both
influences and reveals the structures of thought found in human concepts and
ideas.
Consider also expressions of
patience which may be particular to your culture of origin. What similarities
or differences might exist between these expressions and those found in the
English language that you may have come across?
Save your reflection as “Patience
Exercise 2_Mapping and Reflection”.
Exercise 3: Exploring Alternatives
to Impatience
In Chinese culture, there is also a
very common expression, called “Eating Bitter” (吃苦). According to Hung Kueng ResearchAssociation ,"Eating
Bitter" refers to the way in which pleasant things can only arise when
accompanied with hardship or unpleasant experiences:
The literal
translation is, in fact, "eat bitter" or "eat bitterness".
It comes from the fact that life, or anything, is about good and bad, ups and
downs, sweet or bitter., etc. When something is the opposite of positive, in
this sense, it is a hardship. Without hardship, i.e., bitterness, there can be
no sweetness.
Implicit in this view is the
understanding that patience involves something that is inherently unpleasant,
and that bearing the ‘unbearable’ can create an opportunity for a future
reward.
But, is this the only way to see something that makes us feel
impatient?
Consider the following video I
created, “How to Survive the Canadian Winter”, which showcases a snowstorm that
took place on February 12, 2017 in Toronto:
After watching this video, consider: what alternatives are offered by the video to seeing patience as
‘bearing something painful’ or even the idea that ‘bitter has to come before
the sweet’? What inner shifts do you think are required to view of a
snowstorm as problematic to one of appreciating the everyday and
miraculous?
Can you conceptualize a different
way of framing impatience as opportunity rather than as a way of ‘bearing
an unpleasant situation’?
In their book, How the Way We
Talk Can Change The Way We Work, Kegan & Lahey (2001) describe the
process of challenging ‘Big Assumptions’ about how processes operate in the
world. They describe a process that balances between respecting one’s
assumptions as possibilities and entertaining new possibilities, which
they describe as follows:
Our Big Assumptions are like
favorite hypotheses, and we are like the sort of scientists who, should they
meet disconfirming data, say in effect, “Well, so much the worse for the data!”
Out it goes, and the precious hypothesis is preserved. If we, on the other
hand, vigilantly seek to collect such counterinstances, bring these specimens
back to our group for inspection, and have the opportunity to talk and think
and laugh about them, we take one more step toward building a relationship to
the assumption rather than being run by it. (p.83)
As I am reading about Kegan &
Lahey’s account, I am considering a similar concept in Buddhism, which is known
as “beginner’s mind” (Shoshin; see Suzuki, 1970). Beginner’s mind
might be thought of as a process of becoming aware that all the assumptions we
hold about what we are seeing are really based on aggregate ‘heaps’ of forms,
feelings, perceptions, cognitions and actions, which trigger previous memories
or habits. What we see is usually the conglomerate of a present sensation,
coupled with previous judgments and experiences. If I am open to the
possibility that there are other ways of experiencing something besides
my previous experiences or memory traces, then I start to playfully look for
other ways to experience the object. In doing so, I am not trying to reject my
assumptions outright, so much as I am gently allowing other possibilities to
emerge. All this is done in the spirit of slowing down awareness to see
what is really happening in the moment.
For this next exercise, draw up a
chart which shows examples of situations which might make you feel impatient.
Then, consider, are there ways of looking at this situation that might inspire
us to be more patient and embracing of the situation? Consider the
possibilities hidden behind the assumption that this situation is ‘to be
tolerated’ or ‘suffered through’:
Things that Make You Impatient
|
Hidden Possibilities
|
Long Line Up at the Supermarket
|
-an opportunity to relax and check
out what other people are eating lately
-mindful focus on the breath
-catching up on a book I haven’t
read in a while
-finding new things to research in
the supermarket
|
Delay in Getting a Vacation
Granted at Work
|
-more time delay means more time
to plan the vacation well
-when I do get the vacation, I
will feel much more appreciative than if it were automatically conferred on
me
-I can catch up on my projects
before leaving on vacation, which saves the stress of having to do so when I
return
|
The person in front of me is
criticizing me
|
-maybe this is an opportunity not
to think “I” am separate from the other, but to see things non-dualistically
-everything is my teacher: could I
be learning something new from this experience?
|
Etc.
|
Now, looking back at your examples,
is there a particular one which you feel might be willing to try out in daily
life?
Save your results as “Exercise
3_Exploring Alternatives”. Feel free to post this exercise to your blog if you
feel comfortable to do so.
Exercise 4: Buddhist Perspectives on
Patience
For this section, we will read pages
24-29, from Master Sheng Yen’s The Six Paramitas, entitled “Patience”.
Before we do so, please take a look at the video, "How to Cultivate
Patience":
From the Buddhist perspective, it’s
safe to say that patience is part of a training of mind, in which we start to
surrender our struggles with thoughts and cultivate a different relationship
with thoughts. As Master Sheng Yen remarks in Six Paramitas, “when
there is patience, the mind will be pacified. Not only will the mind be stable,
but the body will also enjoy a sense of well-being” and, “[W]ithout a pacified
mind and body, we can become very agitated and consumed with inner turmoil.”
(p.24). Both remarks suggest that patience requires a calm mind that is not
consumed with the turmoil of thoughts and reactions. Though the term
‘pacified’ may seem to evoke passivity or inactivity, the passage here refers
to a mind that is open enough to take on new actions, rather than being stuck
in a state of reactivity.
Master Sheng Yen also suggests that,
from a Buddhist viewpoint, patience requires a way of seeing things which is
not focused on comparison, results, or a sense of self. If someone is competing
in a race and is always worried about the person just behind them, she or he
will likely not succeed very well (p.25)
Master Sheng Yen furthermore
distinguishes 3 kinds of patience, which he refers to as 1) Patience to those
who wish to harm us; 2) Patience with regard to the Environment; 3) Patient
Endurance of all Dharmas (p.26-27). What is fundamental to all three views of
patience is the particular view that all things exist interdependently, and
have no permanent existence. For instance, the first kind of patience refers to
not striking back at others even if they wish to harm you, under the premise
that, in fact, all beings depend on each other for their survival. As Master
Sheng Yen suggests:
“If we do not habitually respond negatively, it may seem
that we always surrender, but we are actually developing the courage and skills
to protect ourselves as well as others…By analogy, if you refrain from chopping
down a tree every time you need firewood, in the long run the forest is
preserved for future use” (p.25).
In fact, it turns out that the
foundation of the Buddhist understanding of patience is a very nuanced
experience of the emptiness of all things. Contrary to popular belief,
“emptiness” in this context does not refer to an absence or negation (as in
‘this cup is empty’), but rather to the absence of an inherent ‘self’ that is
isolated and fixed in nature.
Go back to the example of waiting in
a supermarket line. If you think that this experience is intolerable or
burdensome, you already commit yourself to the view that something is fixed and
non-negotiable: the lineup is ‘inherently awful’, and there is no way to endure
it except by holding one’s breath (and tongue). But if you observe the
experience closely without putting this conceptual lens of “intolerable” in front
of it, you will find that there is no inherent quality that endures about the
line-up itself.
For one, the line itself is
constantly changing: people check out, to be replaced by other people in the
line.
For another, my attitude changes: I
see myself getting closer to the lineup and feel ecstatic, only to realize that
I forgot to get milk.
Finally, even the sense of pleasant
and unpleasant is relative. Something might feel unbearable, but there is
always a choice in how one bears it, using what thoughts and what patterns of
perception and awareness.
Of the three kinds of patience
described above, surprisingly the third type (Patience Endurance of all
Dharmas) is considered by Master Sheng Yen to be the easiest to practice
(p.27). Why is that? As Master Sheng Yen relates, “you can practice it any time
and anywhere by contemplating the emptiness of all dharmas” (p.27). In a sense,
the first two kinds of patience are dependent on particular experiences—for instance,
meeting with an adversary, or experiencing a pain in the body. But with the
third kind of patience, there is no limitation by conditions, and it can be
practiced anywhere, simply by seeing that dharmas are empty in nature and
constantly shifting with new conditions and thoughts.
Now that you have understood
patience from a Buddhist perspective, think back on the examples from Exercise
3. Pick one or two examples and write a reflection explaining: which of the
three Buddhist kinds of patience you might use to deal with this situation?
Save your reflection as “Patience Exercise 4”. Feel free to post it to your
blog.
Digital Applications of the Buddhist
Paramita of Patience
Can Technology Make People More
Patient? Exploring Digital Spaces Which Cultivate Patience
We have often heard the concern in
many places that technology can lead to distractions, as people are more
tempted to do multiple things, with less mindful attention on any one
particular thing. Part of the reason is that technology can foster the
impatience of wanting to do more with fewer delays, but at the
cost of less attention on the present task that really needs
doing. But can technology play a role in encouraging people to be more patient
with the tasks they are doing in the moment?
In his book The Distraction
Addiction (2013) science historian Alex Soojung-Kim Pang explores some
intriguing ways in which software has been designed to curb the tendency
to distract oneself with the latest news on msn, cellphone messages, etc. Some
of the software he describes and reviews are listed below in point form:
- WriteRoom (https://writeroom.en.softonic.com/mac). This software uses a minimal appearance to discourage users from accessing multiple sights or functions. Pang (2013) aptly describes it as having “a blinking green cursor against a black background. There are no menu bars, no fonts to adjust, no IM windows peeking around the edges, no status updates or email alerts beckoning from the periphery” (p.54). Because this word processor takes over the entire screen, users are less tempted to leave the screen to access other programs. Its minimal appearance (“a black background with bright letters”, p.69), also encourages the writer to cultivate a more authentic experience of their writing voice, rather than being overawed by the bells and whistles of new fonts and text effects.
- OmmWriter (http://www.ommwriter.com/). This word processing software has the feature of automatically turning off email and chat notifications, as well as providing a Zen Buddhist feel that is intended to calm the mind into the process of writing. Pang writes, “your words can hover over a snowy landscape with bare trees under a grey sky, in front of a simple white canvas, or on a blue-grey background.” (Pang, 2013, p.70). An added bonus is the fact that keys make splashing sounds when being typed through this software, thus adding an element of naturalism to the writing experience. Explicit references to Buddhism (p.78) also allow users to contextualize the way they connect with technology using a contemplative lens.
- Chrome Nanny, SelfControl and StayFocusd are softwares which allow you to actively block certain websites from being accessed at certain times of the day (Pang, 2013, p.73)
- Freedom (https://freedom.to/) a software which allows users to manage the use of Internet technologies, such as assigning blocklists to particular devices, or even blocking the Internet altogether at certain times during the day.
Exercise 5: Reflection on Digital
Technology and the Cultivation of Patience
- Considering the above kinds of software, which features do you feel may be most useful to your own practice in cultivating the Buddhist paramita of patience? Are there specific features which resonate with or attract you the most? Do some approaches seem distancing or not conducive to patience? Write a reflection, using the examples above or finding your own examples of software developed to cultivate patience.
You
may also wish to consider trying out a few of these software products for
yourself, and doing a product review to assess to what extent these items can
furnish a space for patience.
- Many of these products reference the notion of authenticity and personal ownership of the technology and how we use it to improve our productivity. While Freedom (https://freedom.to/why) emphasizes will-power as a ‘finite resource’ which is easily depleted by the distractions of the Internet, OmmWriter promises on its website “access to a beautiful distraction-free writing environment where your authentic voice is free to go where it is meant to go” (http://www.ommwriter.com/)
Consider
the following:
a) what does “authentic voice” mean to you, and what kinds
of qualities do you feel that software like OmmWriter are attempting to
‘restore’ to its users?
b) To what extent do we depend on technologies to “cure the
ills” of low will-power, distractions, impatience etc.? Is it true that users
need new technologies like Freedom to prevent will-power from being sapped? Or
is this idea falling into the metaphor of “patience as a finite resource” which
requires restraint and control?
Write your reflections and save them
under Patience Exercise 5 Technology Reflection. Feel free to post this to your
blog.
Exercise 6: Developing
Patience for the Process of Using Digital Technology: The Technology Journal
Many educators have recently started
to explore the role of journaling or diary-keeping, as a means of helping
learners better process their learning as well as articulate the challenges
they experience. Some examples include math journaling, where students can
express the kinds of strategies which they use to solve problems, thus becoming
more aware of strategies which work or don’t work so well (see Watson,
At this stage in the process, you
have already started to develop your own personal blog which showcases the
exercises in this Six Paramitas course. Now that you are starting to play
around with different fonts, features, templates and accessories to enhance
your blog, your next assignment will be to write a technology journal which
briefly chronicles any experiences you have had with developing your blog,
posting articles, customizing the blog, or using other related technologies.
In your technology journal, try to
consider the following:
-what technologies or software have
you been exploring today? Describe the specific technologies and features you
used as well as why you used them (e.g. “today, I learned about the ‘adding
gadgets’ feature on blogger.com, to add pages to my blog”).
-what was going through your mind as
you were using and exploring the technology? What feelings, thoughts, impressions,
or attitudes did you experience? Consider anything that emerges or comes to
mind (e.g. “I felt really distanced when I wasn’t able to find a way to order
my pages”)
-what did you do or think in the
process of addressing your feelings, thoughts or impressions (eg. “I
decided not to use too many gadgets, and focused on putting everything a single
page instead”; or “I went for a walk to cool off”).
When you are finished writing, post
to your blog if you feel comfortable to do so. Try to post an entry to your
Technology Journal anytime you are working with the technologies introduced in
this course.
END OF MODULE 3
References
Kegan, Robert & Lahey, Lisa
Laskow (2001). How the Way We Talk Can Change the Way We Work: Seven
Languages for Transformation. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
Pang, Alex Soojung-Kim (2013). The
Distraction Addiction. New York: Little Brown & Co.
Shengyen (2002). Six Paramitas:
Perfections of the Bodhisattva Path. Elmhurst: Dharma
Drum Publications.
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